If you had met me by chance for the past 2 weeks, tell me something and i'll just forget it almost immediately. It was a hectic week for me. The previous week on friday, I gave tuition to near 12 after work. And since that day, you won't see me home before the clock strikes 12.
On monday, the eve of labour day, I worked till 8+ and headed to Nini's house for tuition. Left at 2+. Reached home.Showered. But it wasn't bedtime for me. Had to do some science papers for the answers. Didn't sleep till 5 in the morning. Before I could really rest, it was time to wake up and continue marking and searching the web for answers to questions I didn't know. And it was time for tuition again.
The worse? I taught till 2.30 on wed and had to wake up at 7+ for work.
Most amazing thing of all? I never thought that talking too much would EVER be one of the reason why I lose my voice. Was wrong. I just kept teaching and teaching. Talking and Talking non-stop for hours and hours. yea... by now you wld have thought drink more water. WHICH I DID!! more than 2 litres a day! It wasn't a sore throat. wasn't any pain to talk abt.
My voice was husky. My boss thought I was sick. For a week plus. I never imagine I could go to such an extent. The strength and determination from God was amazing.
And of all time, I made a terrible mistake at work. My boss had to clear my shit. It wasn't the best time for this to happen. I was feeling terrible. Wanted to quit out of guilt, cause I just felt I was incompetent. Perfectionist u can call me. Humans all make mistakes but I just can't allow myself to have that. I felt condemn. Condemn by my authoriser and boss.
Hannah woke me up with this.
"U're condemning yourself! No one is. God's people will NEVER be condemn!"
For a fact, it was right. All along I was condemning myself, cause now everything is back to normal. They're talking to me. casually just like the past.
That was the past 2 weeks. Hectic. Balancing between work and tuition. Kept busy every single minute,gives me no time or room for my mind to think about other things. The numbness of work. Overworking. I like it. Love it. Wished it could be like tat most of the time. Ain't nuts. I just want it.
Besides this 2 major things, I can't really remember what happen for the week. I think I've overworked so much that for the 2 weeks while I was working my memory span was less than 1 min. Was doing sth and had to divert my attention to something else. But when I'm done, I can't rmb what I have to do. Not just once. Probably a couple of times in a day. =D
Well thank God it's break time now!!
Anyways my mum bought me my 21st birthday pressie already! When i'm only turning 21 in SEPT!! End of SEPT! She said she was anxious. =.=
About what? No idea man.... But what I know is that. She's a super traditional mum when it comes to things like that. By now you might know what she bought for me. A necklace.... with a key pendant. It's white gold. It's really nice and I love it.
I asked why didn't you buy a DIAMOND necklace instead?!!! hahah...
Now that was a joke. Diamond ain't really my thing. Branded goods are never my thing too. It's definitely my mum's! Cause this mother's day, her wish is gonna come true but burn a big hole in my pocket! She's getting a LV for mother's day gift!! Can't believe it?
In fact, I was the one that say I'll buy it for you!! ^-^
Nothing wrong with that. She never bear to buy it for herself. Every single cent she earned, she spent it on us. And how is that 1,000 over bucks bag ever gonna repay her love for us. Something I ought to do.
Was having a casual conversation with my mum that day while I was taking a shower, while she was sitting in the kitchen. I asked her why don't she moved us. After all, we have al grown up and the space is getting smaller! and yea! with all my stuff.
"I can sell this house. Buy a new one and since I have not buy any new house before i'll get some blah blah... but i'm so old already. If I do so now, it's like putting a whole new burden on my shoulder."
She has got a point,I thought to myself.
"Anyways you guys are already so big and getting married in a couple of years. That time we'll just move in with you guys."
I laughed and told her. What if I'm still single at the age of 35!!!
"You won't." That sounded kind of worried from her tone.
I insisted. What if. And she finally said if that's the case, that time u'll buy a new house and we'll stay with you! Not a bad idea eh.
You can't rule out this possibility. The number of single women at the age of 35 is increasing rapidly in Singapore. I told her.
"Mami. Women in your era and my era are so different. And your daughter,me,belongs to the women of MY era."
That means it's the career mindset.
Men and women have equal work opportunities now. Over the years, everything have changed. Education was no longer just for the men but for women too. That was the time when they started to plant the seedling. A society with career-minded women.
In the beginning, men were supposed to lead and women to follow. Asked any women now, out of 10, 7 would laugh at that thinking. Yours truly is one of them.
Question.
Are men getting weaker or are women becoming tougher?
I would say. Men ain't getting weaker but in fact the women are getting tougher. More independent. Men were born to be masculine,tough and strong. Providing the kind of support for women. They still are now. Just that the difference now is that women are catching up.
I wanted to get married at the age of 22. Laugh if you want cause even I,myself, can't help laughing at my sillyness and stupidity. That thought was before I came out to work or rather before some incidents that had happen that made a major change in life.
It didn't took long for me to have the career woman mindset. about a month plus. The early marriage was out of the picture. It was all about supporting myself and my parents. Buy a house myself. Depend on myself,instead of waiting for someone to support me. Not a single tear for anyone or even any stress that come my way.
To me that's a weak woman. Not someone I would want myself to become. Not even a chance!
After so much had happen, it has become clear to me. The exact things that I have to focus and give my all at this point of time.
Enough said. Bedtime!
Ciaoz!
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