A special friend...

Suddenly I don't know how to start... I don't know what to say... There's so many things on my mind but there is only one thing that is bothering me... The one and only significant issue for the day...

I have to come out with the mc script for the MD percussion ensemble... But I can basically think of nothing... And the script is so sucky!!! I don't know what I'm writing, and it's freaking bad!

My feelings are beyond description, for now the only word would be worried...

Yes I'm worried... But not for the outdoor performance at Toa Payoh central... Coz I know we will do just fine! I have faith in all of you! Or rather all of us! People would enjoy and so will we!

Neither am I worried about the talk tml morning or my pack schedule for the coming week... Coz I've been through so many busy weeks and I know how to deal with it...

I know that all these are under my control... I know what's going on and I know how to handle it...

But there's something I know yet not able to do anything about it... It doesn't concerns me but it concerns someone who is important to me...

It came so sudden and I'm shock... But all those were just for awhile... I'm more worried and upset... Worried for you... And upset that I don't know how you feel and that I can no longer ask you directly...

Are you sad? Are you demoralised? Are you thinking why? Are you somewhere trying to vent it out?

I want to know! I want to know so badly!

Can you tell me... or rather I should say will you tell me? Tell me how you feel...

I want to be there for you, give a listening ear and share whatever feeling you are having and the shitty stuff that you are experiencing...

I know I can't... And never can I... Probably you are not feeling the way that I've said... Or probably you have found someone else... But I'm still here and I'll always be... do you know that?

I'm always ready to listen to what you say... I've always been waiting by my phone for your call or waiting for your msg... Even though each time when the phone rings or when I receive a msg, it's not you... I am still waiting for a miracle...

Call me silly... call me dumb or stupid for all you want...

I don't give a damn! Coz it's my right to care for a friend... that mean so much to me... I don't know as a friend how much I worth to you... you have your own rights to choose the friends that you feel are important to you... and I have no say... But I would still care for you the way I did before, even if I worth nothing...

Without fail, I would say a prayer for you almost every night before I go to sleep... Praying that this friend of mine would be safe and sound... No matter where you are or what you are doing...

And tonight before I go to sleep, I would still do the same... Even if you are sleeping, I would pray that you are sleeping soundly and peacefully...

Good night, my friend... Sleep well...